The Results..TMI ahead

So finally after 7 years of marriage(and the first time ever) I decided to see a doctor(or NP is you will). Since I'm a coward it took me that long to work myself up enough to go. I've been having some issues for about a year with my body. I won't gross anyone out, but it involves my lady business. I've also realized that my window for having children is getting smaller.

I went to see a wonderful nurse pacticioner named LeeAnn Gundy. The sweetest woman ever. As terrified as I was she talked me though every step. Then she had my blood drawn(3 vials!) to run a whole bunch of tests. But at least I was rewarded with a earlier showing of Eclipse, so that made me feel better. Then on Thursday she scheduled me for an ultrasound to look at my ovaries and uterus.

Today, I went in to get the results of those tests. I've been diagonsed with PCOS. Polycystic Ovary Syndrome. It leads to weight gain and infertility and a bunch of other crap. My cholesterol is also a little high. So I know have to be on medication for pretty much the rest of my life. With help from this medication it should allow me to have children. We shall see. It should regulate my moods and hopefully help me loss weight.

Not the end of the world, I know, but it will be an adjustment. The pills are huge! I also need to change my diet. We will see how it goes.

Doin' things

Wow, I had a busy couple of weeks. On April 5, I went with three other wild and crazy girls (think of it in a Steve Martin accent, get it yet? Okay moving on...) to the Muse concert in SLC. It was awesome! The whole thing was great. And, unlike Vegas, they played one on my favorite songs: Undisclosed Desires. Of course, I like all their songs, but that one is a fav. These three columns had screens on them and different scenes were put on them. Wow, again. Because what more can you say? I'm not the type of person who leads an exciting life, but this was cool.

Last Friday night, several girls from work along with boyfriends and spouses went bowling. Thunder Alley as it is known. It was so much fun. Especially with this group of people. They are so funny. Ever trying bowling left handed? Yeah, neither have I. But the hubby did for one game. Hilarious. I tried once and my ball almost landed in the next lane. It's always nice to hang with people who have a sense of humor.

In between all of that I've been working a lot lately. Not that I mind. Just helping the boss play catch up. It's always a good time.

On Saturday, me and bosslady went to cheer on the SLC marathoners and did some shopping. I was able to get a few ideas on how I want to decorate my family room..

Hubby has a doctor's appointment on Thursday so we will see how that goes.

Random.

Long time, no post. Hee. I never know what to say. But I'm like that in real life too. I get awkward, my mind goes blank and I got nothing say. I do alot of thinking though. Sometimes I think about how stuck I feel. Like I'm going no where, like I've accomplished nothing. Do you ever feel that something has to give?

A couple weeks ago I was lying in bed and had a strong sense of my mortality. It was like a huge weight has dropped on me. I saw black, darkness, a void. Like when this life is gone, there will be nothing. I'm not scared of death. I think I'm more scared of being unproductive and useless in this life.

I'm not trying to say that my life is not a happy one, it is. I sometimes just feel like I'm not living up to the expectations that people have for me. The reason that bothers me so much is not because I have to be perfect for everyone, but because I feel like I want to live up to them. I wanted to be successful in these things.

My brain is an interesting place.

Next thought on my mind: Can I really start running again?